A child’s behaviour is often quite a reflection of how their parents behave & come across. The following are a list of ways how parents affect behaviour according to Behaviour Analysts:
1) How Their Parents Handle Problems – Parents who demonstrate in their own behaviour how to stay cool, calm & collected, in turn tend to have children who show a much better ability at managing anger, & present with less behaviour challenges.
2) How Their Parents Speak Up For Themselves – Parenting is a role whereby little eyes are watching, & when they see their parents holding space & speaking up for themselves, Behaviour Therapists point out that this then teaches the child that they too are important & should always speak up for themselves too.
3) Whether Their Parents Ask For Help – When a child sees their parents at times admit that they don’t know something & are asking for help, this shows the child that not everyone knows everything & this is ok, & most importantly, that it is ok to reach out & ask for help. Otherwise, when a child needs help & feels unable to ask for it, this can lead to the child presenting with negative & attention-seeking behaviours as a cry for help.
4) How Their Parents Navigate Conflict – How parents affect behaviour, can be seen if a child grows up in a house where parents are arguing & shouting, as it increases the likelihood of that child responding to conflict by having tantrums, & displaying similar behaviours to what their parents are showing.
5) How Their Parents Apologise & Repair – By parents setting a positive example of apologising when they should, & making amends after an argument, this makes it likely that their child will imitate this behaviour also. By setting a good example such as this, this will improve the child’s interactions with their siblings, peers, parents, etc., resulting in less sibling rivalry, arguments with their peers/parents, etc.
6) How Their Parents Treat People & Animals – Studies in the field of Behaviour Analysis highlight, that a child brought up in a loving, caring home, where they watch their parents showing kindness to others & to animals, in turn increases the chances of that child growing up to show care towards animals & towards other people also.
7) How Their Parents Take Care Of Themselves – Child Therapists often underline the importance of parents making a point of demonstrating self-care, in order for children to realise how important it is, & the need for everyone to fill their own cup, in order to be able to help others too, without burning themselves out.
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