The following article describes what children want & how their parents can provide it for them:
Love – Behaviour Analysts highlight that the most important thing for any parent to do on their parenting journey, is to make their child feel loved. This love should be unconditional, & their child should know that nothing they could ever do, could stop their parents from loving them.
A Safe Space – It is a big world out there, & parents won’t always be by their child’s side every second to help them. This is why it is so important for parents to convey to their child from an early age, that home is their safe space, where their parents will always be there for them to support them & keep them safe.
Their Parents Quality Time – It is essential that parents make the time for quality one-to-one time with their child. It is especially important as life is so busy for everyone nowadays, & often quality one-to-one time between parents & their child is not consciously fitted in, & as a result may not happen very often. Studies in the field of Behaviour Analysis have found that if a child doesn’t get regular quality time with each of their parents, this can lead to sibling rivalry, with the child competing with their siblings for their parents attention.
Encouragement – Encouragement is so important, especially from a young age. When a child has received lots of encouragement from their parents, they are more likely to try new things, to put themselves out there for new opportunities, & they are more likely to have more self-confidence in doing so, as they got plenty of encouragement to do so from their parents all of their lives.
For Their Parents To Talk With Them & Not Just To Them – Child Therapists underline that when parents just talk at their child, this gives the message to the child that they should be quiet, that their opinion doesn’t matter, & to just do as they are told. However, when parents take the time to talk with their child, this is what children want, as it shows a level of respect from the parent to the child, & it highlights to the child that their views are important.
For Their Parents To Listen To What They Have To Say – No Matter How Small Or Irrelevant It May Seem – Behaviour Therapists point out how this is an important thing for parents to do, as when a child doesn’t feel heard & doesn’t feel like their parents are truly listening or giving them the respect they should, this can lead to strong feelings of frustration & difficulty with managing anger. This in turn can lead to tantrums, outbursts, etc.
For Their Parents To Play With Them – If parents don’t make the time to regularly play with their child, the child will try to initiate attention & interaction from the parent. However, if the child initiates it, & the parent still doesn’t give the child the interaction & attention that they are looking for, oftentimes, the child will then resort to attention-seeking through negative means then instead.
Praise – Praise is such an important element for parents to regularly give to their child. When a child is given praise for positive behaviours, it makes it more likely that that particular behaviour will occur again in the future. This means that if you praise your child for lots of positive behaviours, there is a higher chance that your child’s overall behaviour will be positive & there should be less behaviour challenges overall.
Guidance & Support – This is such an important thing for parents to always be ready to give their child. When a child has their parents backing them, this has such a positive impact on the child’s behaviour, making them feel a lot more confident & secure knowing that they have their parents guiding them & cheering them on.
To Know They Matter – This is one of the most essential things in life for everyone. It is critical that a child knows that they are loved & that they matter. This is why it is so important that parents are self-aware in what they say & how they behave towards their child, so that their child has no doubt in their mind that they matter & always will.
The above is a list of what children want & are always striving to get from their parents, & it is essential that parents are aware of these things, & providing it to their children.
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