Things To Tell Children | The Child Behaviour Consultancy

The following are 10 phrases for parents, highlighted by a Behaviour Analyst as being important things to tell children regularly:

1) I Love You – This is the most important phrase for parents to use on a regular basis when parenting. It is so important for parents to use this phrase from when the child is born, & for the parent to continue telling the child this always, even when they are grown up, & in their adult life. Behaviour Therapists underline that a person knowing that they are loved, is a basic human need, & the most important thing a parent needs to put across, is that there is nothing that their child can ever do, to make them stop loving them.

2) You Are The Best Boy/Girl In The World – Again, Child Therapists underline how this is such a powerful phrase for parents to often tell their child. The reason being is, that it builds up their confidence when told this from a young age, & gives them a strong sense of worth for when they go out into the world. Also, the positive connotation associated with this phrase in telling them that they are “the best boy” or “the best girl”, reduces the likelihood of them presenting with many behaviour challenges, as you keep reinforcing to them how great they are.

3) You Can Be Anything – Parents reinforcing this statement with their child, removes any unlimiting beliefs that the child might have about what they are capable of or what they can achieve. By parents letting the child know that the sky is the limit, this opens the child up to a vast amount of opportunities, & the confidence in themselves to achieve it.

4) You Are The Greatest – This is such a powerful statement for a parent to repeatedly tell their child, as it builds their self-esteem & confidence in themselves, so that the child is unlikely to hold themselves back in the choices they make in life.

5) I Love Listening To Your Stories – In terms of things to tell children, this is an important statement for a child to hear, as it makes them feel heard, & that their voice matters. When a child feels seen, heard & listened to, it helps them relax in the comfort of this, & reduces the need for them to present with attention-seeking behaviours.

6) You Are So Brave – When a parent reinforces this statement with their child, it has such a positive impact on the child’s mindset. As studies in the field of Behaviour Analysis have found, that when a child hears something said to them enough times, the child starts to believe that it is true. In turn, there is a higher chance of it having a positive impact on the child’s behaviour, with the child being more brave in situations they come across.

7) It Is Great Being Your Mum/Dad – This is a great phrase for parents to use, in order to show their child that they are happy that they are the child’s parent. When the parent often lets the child know this, this reduces the likelihood of sibling rivalry, as each child feels acknowledged & appreciated.

8) You Are So Smart – This is an excellent phrase for parents to reiterate to their child. It quenches any doubts the child might have of their own ability. In stepping forward in life with things, the child is likely to have more confidence doing so, as they believe in their own intelligence & capacity to handle things.

9) You Are So Strong – This is an extremely beneficial belief for parents to instill in their child. Life is hard, & people meet many challenges along the way. If a child grows up knowing they are resilient & strong, this is going to stand to them to no end all throughout life.

10) You Can Tell Me Anything – When it comes to things to tell children, this is such an important one for parents to get across to their child. The reason being is, that in times of difficulty, the child is then more likely going to turn to the parent for help & support, rather than bottling it all up. When left to the child to address on their own accord, this can put a lot of stress on the child, which can come out as negative behaviour, with the child having difficulty managing anger, having outbursts & tantrums, etc. On the other hand, having a parent to support them through difficult situations, makes it more likely that the situation will be addressed more easily, & in the best way possible.

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