Difficulty With Child’s Behaviour?

For parents who are having difficulty with their child’s behaviour, for e.g., their child displaying behaviour challenges such as having tantrums, sibling rivalry, presenting with negative attention-seeking behaviours, etc. – Behaviour Therapists highlight the importance of not discussing the negative behaviour in front of your child or when they are nearby.

Behaviour Analysts point out that children’s minds are like sponges & are constantly taking everything in & trying to make sense of it. Even when they are busy playing/doing something & it doesn’t seem like they are listening, they are still taking in what you are saying especially when they know that it’s them that you are talking about.

In terms of parenting, research from the field of Behaviour Analysis has shown that if a child keeps hearing you talking about how “bold/bad” they are, how they “just won’t listen”, how “hard work” they are, how “they have a problem managing their anger”, how “none of the rest of their siblings were like that”, etc. then this starts to register with them as the truth & they start to believe that this is who they are & therefore live up to it.

Also, if one of the reasons that your child is presenting with negative behaviour is to get attention & they then hear you discussing the behaviour with your partner/their teacher/childminder, etc. then this is just adding to the attention (even though it’s negative attention) that is being given to the behaviour, which makes it more likely that the behaviour will occur again in the future.

Child Therapists recommend that if you need to talk with your partner/their teacher/childminder, etc. about your child’s behaviour then it is best to do so when your child is not in the room & cannot hear.

It’s a Small Tip to Remember that Can Make Such a Big Difference.